What Makes Good Sex (Essence Style)

Recently, I read another blogger’s post entitled “What Makes Good Sex”. Single Black Man in NoVA: Shawn's Perspective: What Makes Great Sex? …….” It was written from a guy’s perspective and I found it to be very informative and interesting. So interesting that it motivated me to think about what makes good sex to me. I know that everyone is different so what makes good sex to me may not make good sex to another person. Anywho here is my list.

1. There has to be a connection there. Some type of chemistry the makes you physically attracted to the person.

2. The setting is very important. Candles, scents and music are a very nice touch.

3. Excellent foreplay. This should actually have been happening long before you even make it to the bedroom. Sexy text messages or notes. Maybe a little phone sex. The set up to what’s to happen later.

4. The guy needs to be confident in his game. Bringing it like he is sure of his self and knows he can put it down. There is nothing worst than a timid man in the bedroom.

5. Unhibited. Being open minded and willing to try new things and positions.

6. The main goal should be to satisfy your partner.

7. Good communication. Being able to say what you want, what you like, don’t like, etc.

8. Toys and movies are good enhancers.Some men have a problem with toys. What is that about?

I could name a few more but I think I have covered the major stuff. After comparing my list to his list, I realize that they are a lot alike. Hmmmmmm.

My Journey

My eyes have seen things so awful I can’t describe or explain
My ears have heard the screams of those crying out in pain
My mouth has called out His name when I have been in the storm
My heart has been broken but yet is still caring and warm

I have been humbled by some of the hard knocks of life
I have been fighting for those people others call lowlife
I have been down to the valley and lived among the poor
I have been awaken in the middle of the night by strangers pounding on my door

I have been following my calling of being a servant for the Man above
I have been out in the streets mentoring, spreading His love
I have been willing to give up my worldly possessions to help someone in need
I have been blessed to be able to perform these wonderful deeds

My eyes have seen Him work many miracles every day
My ears have heard the peoples’ words as they kneel and pray
My mouth has called on Him time and time again
My heart has been touched by those I’m proud to have as friends

My True Essence

Beautiful Black Queen

We are adored by all men and envied by women who want to be like us
We know hope, faith and trust in each other and our families is a must
We trust in God to guide and protect us from harm that comes our way
So to stay strong and focused, we pray and we pray and we pray

We are a very emotional, sexual and sensual kind of creature
Wide hips and gorgeous full lips are our best feature
We are naturally blessed with the things many people pay big money for
These traits keep our men wanting us and coming back for more

We are the heart and soul of our family, the glue that holds it together
We are caring and always giving our all to everything whether
It’s being a mother, wife or friend while holding down a successful career
Tackling each task with honor like a soldier who has no fear

They say we are sometimes too sassy and independent for our own good
So some brothers look for love elsewhere when they know they should
Be loving, building and creating with us a life like a dream
But eventually they come back because no one can replace their beautiful black queen

My True Essence

Internet Love

I’m late so I’m rushing. Hurrying. Trying to get there on time

Going to meet this mysterious man I’ve been chatting with online

I usually don’t do the internet thing but I decided to throw caution to the wind

If we don’t hit it off, I may at least have a new friend

I took extra time to get ready because it’s imperative that I look my best

While in the car driving, I’m thinking, wondering if he will pass my test

You know the test when you confirm all the things he said are true

To make sure he’s real, sincere and has not been lying to you

I’m excited yet a little nervous because I don’t know what’s waiting for me

Will he be everything that I imagine and want him to be

As I arrive at the meeting spot, my heart starts to pound

I stand there for a minute just looking around

Looking for the man who has captured my attention from many miles away

I can’t decide if I should make a run for it or sit down and stay

As I am searching, I turn to see this gorgeous hunk of man

Walking towards me with a rose in his hand, it’s a part of our plan

At that moment, I smile and began to thank God above

For sending me someone that I hope to one day love

My True Essence

Trip

I want to take a trip to a special exotic place far away
A place where the food is wonderful and the music makes me sway
To the mellow sounds of the jazz band doing their thing
Sounds so good to me makes me wish I could sing

The island is unbelievable, a mini paradise offering only the best
Of entertainment, luxury, fun and even some much needed rest
The view is so breathtaking it deserves to be on the cover of a magazine
By far, one of the most incredible sites I have ever seen

At the beginning of the day, the sun rises and shines so bright
Yet the moon’s glow on the water can only be seen at night
The ocean is like magic, clear and crystal blue
If you listen carefully, you can hear the waves singing to you

I want to take a walk on the beach with my sandals in my hand
Striding slowly and barefoot on the hot moist sand
Taking deep breaths, enjoying the clean and freshness of the air
Loving the feel of the gentle breeze blowing through my hair

At night, I want to sit on the deck with my wrap and a fruity drink
Allow myself to just sit still, calm my nerves and think
Pull out my favorite journal and good writing pen
Put into words the things I’ve done and places I’ve been

I can’t wait to take my trip, get away and be me
Forget my cares for just a little while and be free

My True Essence

That Chick

I want to be that chick that makes you pause in midair
The one who makes you stop and just stare
The one who makes you want to thank the Creator above
For blessing me with so much to love
I want to be that chick that can capture the attention of everyone around
Without saying a word or making a sound
The one who can make you turn in your little black book
Make you want to treat me like a queen, even clean and cook
I want to be that chick you want to take home
To visit where you lived before you became grown
Meet your family and become a special part of your life
See if I have the potential and what it takes to become your wife
I want to be that chick that is different from all of the rest
The one who supports you; encourages you to be your best
Your ride or die, there for you until the end
Your life partner, lover, confidant but more importantly, your friend
I want to be . . . That chick

My True Essence

Start Over

Ever just want to get in your car and just drive until you can’t drive anymore? Leaving behind everyone and everything to start a new life. The life you envisioned so many years ago. The life where all of your plans came together and all of your dreams came true. As the saying goes . . . If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans. He is probably still laughing at me. I wonder how my new life would be . . .

My True Essence